The List of Five
This is the first Encouragement Note of 2023. Thank you for subscribing and for reading. About this time each year, I reflect on the previous year and consider what challenges or opportunities might be next. Writing this Encouragement Note has been helpful with this.
When Insecurities Get in the Way
It really is important to pay attention to those from whom you can learn. Recently, I read Quincy Jones’ new book, 12 Notes On Life and Creativity. Jones is a well known musician, songwriter, composer, arranger, and film/television producer.
At one point, he said, “An ego really is an over-dressed insecurity.” That phrase got my attention.
An over-dressed insecurity.
Have you seen egos that seem to be “over-dressed insecurities?”
I think of the young business person who did not graduate from college. He always felt a sense of inferiority because he had no college degree. He rarely passed up an opportunity to mention how unnecessary college is for business success. For example, he would sometimes point to a CEO, whose business was in trouble, and comment “All that education sure isn’t doing him any good right now!”
A woman in her late 70s seemed to have real difficulty accepting her age. She often appeared arrogant as she communicated to others her superior knowledge about various subjects and some of the important people she knew. As she went to great lengths to communicate this knowledge, it became apparent that she was actually masking much insecurity.
Several young couples get together socially on a regular basis. One couple is more financially affluent than the others. When the couples get together, the conversation invariably becomes focused on the affluent couple’s exotic trip, their luxury car, or their presence at an exclusive gathering. At times, they almost seem to be uncomfortable if they are not the center of attention.
You and I are probably aware of some of our own insecurities. Our egos can take over and we might deal with these insecurities by “over-dressing” them. As a result, some of us can even come across as egotistical, arrogant, and wrapped up in ourselves.
Ultimately, however, real security doesn’t come by trying to hide insecurities or attempting to create a particular persona or impression with someone else.
As Christ-followers, our real security is found in Christ, who is able to make us whole and mend our broken places. Our identity and sense of worth are found in him and the worth he has given each one of us.
Finding our identity in Christ can relieve you and me of much self-imposed pressure. We don’t have to posture and position ourselves so that we always appear to come out on top. Sometimes, this reveals itself in a tendency to always appear that we “get it” while others who are lacking just don’t understand. Instead, you and I can rest in Christ, knowing that our true identity and security are never truly threatened.
When our children were very small, I used to whisper to them, particularly just before bedtime, “You are just right.” I have since whispered the same message to each one of our grandchildren.
May we begin this New Year knowing that when our identity is in Christ, “You are just right.” Is this something you need to hear today?
As You Look Ahead
The head football coach and I were standing on the parking lot of the high school. I told him that a minister in town spoke highly of him. This particular minister works with an inner-city church. This football coach went on to tell me how much he respected this minister. “He is all about street-level faith.”
“Street-level faith” is a good way of describing what Christ-followers practice as we attempt to navigate daily life. We do this, not compartmentalizing life into various segments, but learning to live with faith in the ordinary mundane moments.
Every New Year, some people set goals, look ahead, etc. Others don’t do this at all. Speaking only for myself, I have found the New Year to be a good time to pause. It is also been a time in which I have made adjustments to my life.
Today, as I pause, I am committed to the following:
I want to exam my life.
What is a habit or tendency in my life that needs to change?
If I were to take God seriously regarding what God wants me to do, what is my next step?
What kind of person, husband (wife), father (mother), single, etc. would I like to be twelve months from now?
I want to begin the New Year seeking wisdom.
Wisdom is not trying to get more “likes” on Facebook or Instagram. (After all, the capability to do this on Facebook did not even begin until 2009.) Wisdom has been around much, much longer. Wisdom is knowledge that is lived out and tested. We ask God for wisdom and trust that he will give us what we need (James 1:5). Wisdom is a part of street-level faith which results in the good life (James 3:13, 17-18).
I want to remember that God is with me.
God is with me as I attempt to walk with him. Note in particular the following verse (Isa. 41:10):
So do not fear, for I am with you;
do not be dismayed, for I am your God.
I will strengthen you and help you;
I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.
Beautiful People Do Not Just Happen
I love this quote by Elizabeth Kubler-Ross from her book, Death: The Final Stage of Growth.
I first read these words in Scott Sauls’ book Beautiful People Don’t Just Happen: How God Redeems Regret, Hurt, and Fear In The Making of Better Humans. Sauls, a long time minister in Nashville, speaks of his own experience with regret, hurt, and fear. He also discusses his battle with depression and anxiety. This is an excellent book which I plan to read a second time.
On Sunday mornings, some Christians in church buildings may appear to be well put together, fully capable, and generally doing all the right things in the right way. Yet, if we were to scratch below the surface, we might see that many of their lives are far messier than what they appear.
While this book acknowledges that we are unfinished, it points the way to becoming a people who are “on the mend.”
Note some of the following quotes from the book:
We are not home yet. That’s the hard news. The hopeful news is that Home awaits.
Every person you meet is fighting a hard, hidden battle.
No matter how hard we try to make it so, this present world refuses to be our paradise. We cannot make heaven happen for ourselves because heaven can only be given and received. When we accept and receive this truth, the revival of our hearts is made more possible.
Five Vital Behaviors (Especially for Ministers and Other Church Leaders)
Pay attention to your own spiritual transformation. Are you and I in the process of becoming more Jesus-like? While we have certainly not arrived, are we taking the spiritual transformation journey seriously?
Deal with your issues. It is critical that you and I deal with our baggage, our habits and our negative tendencies. It is especially important that we choose to address the issues in our lives that have really never been dealt with in light of who we are in Christ.
Do at least some work that is important to your co-workers or to the people to whom you are accountable. A minister might say, “I am doing what I think is most important.” Yet, is there at least some room for a few things that others might believe to be important?
A few years ago, I was in a lunch conversation with a good friend, who has been in a key management role in his company for many years. He told me about a conversation with a young man who was experiencing a difficult relationship with his manager. My friend told him to do two things that he knew his manager wanted done. He said, “You are frustrated with your manager. I hear you. You are not getting what you want or need from him. Yet, the relationship does not get better as you ignore what he wants you to do. Why not start by doing a few things your manager says are important to him. Just do a couple of things you know he wants you to do. Then talk with him about about what you need.” There is something here that might be helpful when a minister considers how to work with elders.
Follow through. This simply means that if you promise to do something, you do it. If you promise to follow up with a text or e-mail, this is what you do. If you say, “I will get back with you to let you know when I am available for lunch,” this is what you do. Am I a person who follows through on what I say?
Speak the language of the church. There is a particular language (often academic) that is spoken in a seminary. I recall a Sunday morning in which I was visiting a congregation in our area. A young seminary student went to the podium and gave a brief talk just before the Lord’s Supper. He talked about a “pericope” in the Gospel of Luke. (This refers to a section of a text, usually in the Gospels.)
This was a congregation of hard-working people. They were intelligent but many were not college graduates and none of them had attended a seminary. I suspect that few, if anyone, knew what the word “pericope” meant. Again, the problem was not their intelligence. Many have jobs that require a technical language that might baffle most anyone else not trained in that particular line of work. Yet, it is important that we speak the language that most people in these congregations can grasp. It is important that we not assume they understand our technical language.
Etcetera: Reading and Listening
Note the book mentioned above, Scott Sauls’ fine work, Beautiful People Just Don’t Happen. This well written book was such a good read!
I listened to Quincy Jones’ book on creativity, 12 Notes on Life and Creativity. This was a very good and practical audio book.
Recently I read a journal article which got my attention. “Too Reluctant to Reach Out: Receiving Social Support Is More Positive Than Expressers Expect” (Psychological Science, Vol 33, 2022, pp. 13-1312) by James A. Dungan, David M. Munguia Gomez and Nicholas Epley. What really got my attention in the article is that often when we attempt to express support and encouragement, we are too pessimistic about the good that such a gesture will actually do. These gestures, according to this journal article, do far more good than we might expect.
Each Thursday/Friday, I post about ten tweets especially for ministers and other believers as they anticipate Sunday. You can find me @jimmartin.
I serve as Vice President of Harding School of Theology, Memphis, Tennessee. Every other Monday morning, I publish this “Encouragement Note.” You can subscribe at jimmartin.substack.com. You can also find me on Facebook - @jim.martin or Instagram - @jimmartin.jm. My e-mail address is: jmartin9669@gmail.com. Feel free to write. I would love to hear what is encouraging or helpful. — Jim Martin
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