In the last few weeks, I have spent time with two different young men. Each one is a husband, a father, and a Christ-follower. As I listened to each young man talk about his life, and desire to serve, I was encouraged.
I know there are men and women whose lives are littered with poor decisions. However, there are also many young men and women who are following Jesus and living to honor him.
Hopefully something in the following “Encouragement Note” will brighten your day.
(Unsplash - Михаил Секацкий)
(The entire “Encouragement Note” is available as a podcast. See audio above)
The List of Five
There’s More Than What You Might See in the Mirror
In his book, Clowning in Rome (p. 87), Henri Nouwen tells the story of a sculptor whose studio was next door to the home of a little boy. One day a big flatbed truck pulled up to the studio and delivered an enormous block of marble. The big front doors to the studio opened and the marble was wheeled up into the studio. The little boy, playing in the front yard, followed the workers to see what would happen. Later, he watched as the sculptor took his hammer and chisel and began to chip away at the piece of stone. The boy eventually lost interest and went away.
Weeks later, the boy went back into the studio and to his amazement, he no longer saw a big chunk of stone, but saw in its final phase a beautifully carved lion. The boy was amazed and said, “How did you know that there was a lion in that marble?”
When you look in the mirror, what do you see? You might not see very much beyond plain, ordinary you. Or, you might see inadequacy and failure. You might see someone who has always felt “less than” others.
Others look in the mirror and see an attractive woman, a successful business person, or an affluent 40 year old. If this is all you see, you may become almost desperate for others to see that you are “more than” others.
Yet, when you yield to God and he works in your life, something beautiful is being formed. “But now, O Lord, you are our Father; we are the clay, and you are our potter; we are all the work of your hand” (Isa. 64:8 ESV)
That beauty is never diminished by your age, wrinkles, weight, or size. That beauty transcends any failure in the past. What is being formed is more important than your education, your business accomplishments, or your financial worth. You don’t have to brag, boast, or attempt to manipulate the attention in the room.
God is shaping and forming you. In his eyes, you matter and you are significant.
So, go ahead and look in the mirror. But don’t be distracted by the superficial. In Christ, as God shapes and forms you, your beauty reflects the very character of God.
THAT is a good life!
If Someone Else Took Control of Your Life Right Now
James Clear, author of Atomic Habits writes a brief but useful newsletter each week. In a recent issue (March 31, 2022), he asked this question:
If someone took control of your life tomorrow, what’s the first thing they would change?
This one made me think.
Yet, allow me to edit this one for our purposes. Suppose your children were grown (they may be). Now suppose they were able to go back in time and make an adjustment in their dad or mom. What is the first thing they would change?
Some possibilities:
“I would take away my dad’s secret. His use of pornography almost destroyed our family.”
“I would change my parents’ marriage. I want them to cherish one another.”
“I would remove the worry from my mother’s life and replace it with a rich confidence in God’s care.”
“I would make my dad more attentive to my life in Jesus. I appreciate what I learned from him about baseball, business, etc. However, I really wish he had talked with me about his own faith in the Lord.”
“I would cause my parents to be fully present when we were children. I don’t think they have any idea how much time they spent staring at their screens, even when we (their children) were present.”
What would someone else change, if they had control of your (or my) life right now?
This is worth thinking about!
What Am I Doing Consistently?
When I was a young minister, there was little on my resume. I had graduated from college and seminary. However, I wasn’t sure what else to include. (I wasn’t sure that I should include on my resume, the years I worked part-time for UPS loading trucks.) Also, I didn’t want to “puff” the document and make it appear that I had done far more than I really had. Then, I would think about the words of others regarding a particular experience, “This will look good on your resume.”
Some of us may relish in our experiences, our training, our education, and our accomplishments. While these may add to our competency, they can become a source of pride.
Yet, one important concern for anyone attempting to navigate life is not “What have you done?” but rather, “What are you doing? What decisions are you making right now that might keep you moving in the right direction?”
Consider what you might be doing right now for your own growth and maturity:
Are you becoming more Christ-like right now? Are you becoming a better husband/wife right now? Are you becoming a better man or woman right now?
Are you focused on knowing God right now? Are you reading, thinking, and coming to know Scripture and God right now?
Are you relating to others in a way that is mature and reflects who you are in Christ? Do you refuse to make excuses for your negativity, your critical spirit, and your refusal to forgive? Instead, are you intentional about relating to others in a way that reflects a commitment to grow into the image of Christ?
Are you presently doing what you know God wants you to do as a disciple of Jesus? Or, do you rely on what you have already done?
If I take the teachings of Jesus seriously, what do I need to do now?
A lady was once asked if she would help in the pre-school class at her congregation. She replied, “No way — I’ve put in my time!” She apparently meant that since she used to teach the pre-school class a long time ago, she was certainly not going to help or teach again.
None of us have “put in our time” with Jesus. It matters what I do today as a husband, a father, and most of all, a follower of Jesus.
Ministry Survival #1 (Especially for Ministers and Other Church Leaders)
The following is from a list I created entitled “Ten Ways to Survive in the First Year of a Ministry with a Congregation.” If you are a new minister, this may be very helpful. If you are a seasoned, experienced minister, this can be helpful to review occasionally. This may be a reminder of some basics that you want to remember.
Learn to love the congregation well. This is critical. Pray that God might give you the strength and capacity for this kind of loving.
Know that when you begin to serve a congregation, many of these people are wondering, “Does this minister like us?” They will also be asking themselves, “Do I like this minister?” Also, “Does this minister have the skill to do this?” Respond to this, not by trying appear like-able or by trying to appear competent. Rather, respond with genuine authenticity.
Build trust. Start by being trustworthy in your marriage and with your children. Be trustworthy with your words and actions. Know that building trust takes time.
Appreciate the “honeymoon.” The honeymoon is what many, if not most, ministers experience when they first arrive to serve a congregation. It is actually the period of suspended judgement. These people are watching and waiting as they decide whether or not they like this minister. For best results, ministers should focus on #1, #2, and #3.
Be intentional about getting to know them. Allow them the opportunity to get to know you. Start with their names. Children and adults notice when someone seems to know their name. Don’t use the worn out excuse, “I’m bad with names.” Make the effort. Write the name in your phone or on your notepad. Write down details about the person you would like to remember. Seriously, this is basic but it is also important.
(To be continued in “Jim Martin’s Encouragement Note #56)
Reading/Listening Resources
Listened to Carey Nieuwhof interview Ann Voskamp regarding the power of vulnerability. Good for me to hear this. Also see Nieuwhof’s 57 “Pieces of Unsolicited Advice for Your Life and Leadership.”
Heard an excellent podcast with historian John Dickson (“Undeceptions”) on “Science Wars.” Very helpful. Also, listened to Dickson’s outstanding interview with Tim Keller.
I am listening to Cal Newport’s Deep Work. While I am very familiar with this book. listening to the audio has helped me think through my work habits again.
I read read Liz Huntley’s book, More Than a Bird, given to me by friends in Montgomery, Ala. An excellent book! Her Ted Talk, “Be a Game-Changer,” is very good.
Each Thursday/Friday, I post about ten tweets especially for ministers and other believers as they anticipate Sunday. You can find me @jimmartin.
I serve as Vice President of Harding School of Theology, Memphis, Tennessee. Every other Monday morning, I publish this “Encouragement Note.” You can subscribe at jimmartin.substack.com. You can also find me on Facebook - @jim.martin or Instagram - @jimmartin.jm. My e-mail address is: jmartin9669@gmail.com. Feel free to write. I would love to hear what is encouraging or helpful. — Jim Martin
Jim Martin's Encouragement Note #55